I got another confession to make, I'm a fool. I was involved in a near
fatal speeding "incident" yesterday night on the High Street in Manby. Me and my mate Finbarr were doing our usual Saturday night cruise, and I must have been maxing at about 110mph, pedal to the metal. The lady I was in charge of was a modded Austin Maxi, the engine has alway been a pleasure to work on, and I'd fitted her with all the best kit.
The piece de resistance was the NEXT brushed silver effect tax disc holder. She look(ed) severely pimped with flame paint effects down both wings, and a howling barbary ape on the bonnet. I had "torque of the town" stencilled on the back window.
You get the picture anyway (rinse-out). Anyway, things went horribly wrong when I heard a loud scraping sound down the off-side and the brief yelling of a person. I hauled on the anchors, watching the smoke pour off the tyres as she screeched to a halt. I spin her round, and take her back up the
one-way system towards where the sound happened.
There's a freakin bird there - what we like to call a MILF in these parts of the world, in a shopmobility. She claims the Maxi hit her as she rode onto the zebra crossing outside SupaSnaps. I could see that there were quite clearly marks along the side, and the sound indicated that I had definitely hit something, BUT it was definitely not my fault.
a) The orange lights on the crossing weren't working - so pedestrians did not have right of way b) She didn't have any lights on her wagon c) I don't think she could see very well as she kept screwing up her eyes when she was talking to me
Anyway, she reckons she's going to get her insurance company onto me - but I just laughed because quite clearly I'm going to get my insurance company onto her. However, I have a massive dilemma. Despite the clear disadvantages, she was a hotty. I reckon she can move a bit too as she'd obviously been clubbing, if she's out and about at that time in the morning. I am also in the position where I have her name and number and address, so my question to the floor is this. Do I:
a) Forget my frustrations, pursue the claim and find another bird b) Hold the claim over her head to make sure she beds me (use the guilt trip route) c) Chat her up and kindly offer to forget about the incident and hope that my charms work on her.
I think you'll all agree that this is a tricky one. Please help.
Stan