I've seen some unbelievably stupid things performed in parking lots. Things that you absolutely would not believe. However, today, I have seen the epitome of stupidity and arrogance.
I returned to my Beater Car after a bit of shopping at Costco with a ladyfriend. Since I took The Beater, I thought nothing of parking alongside the other sheep in the lot, figuring hey, what could anyone possibly do to a Beater car?
The answer was both shocking and unbelievable.
As I approached The Beater, I notice the ass-end of a large shopping car barely sticking out in-between my car and a brand-new Chevy pickup next to me. As I got closer, I noticed that the owner of the pickup was an average white guy in his 50's; his wife and granddaughter were inside the cab. He looked like a basic dumbass, but I had no idea that he lacked any brain matter whatsoever.
This moron had actually pulled the cart in-between our cars, clear up to his door, because he was too damn lazy to carry his groceries an extra 10 feet. He actually wedged the cart between our cars, tight! I couldn't believe the stupidity I was witnessing.
With a puzzled look I said, "Mister, what in the HELL are you doing?" He offered the obligatory 'deer in the headlights look' without saying a word. Again I queried, "Are you stupid or something? You've damaged the side of both our cars!" He looks down and stupidly says, "Huh, where?"
Normally this would be laughable, considering that it was only my ugly-ass old Beater car here, but I was aghast at the raw, slack-jawed stupidity I was witnessing here. Could a human being actually be so GD stupid as to shove a cart in tight against 2 parked cars to offload groceries? Apparently so!
All I could muster was "Git yer GD cart away from my car you stupid SOB, or I'll kick your nasty ass across this parking lot!" It must have sounded convincing, as he immediately gave it a shove or two to move it back out (it was stuck between the cars pretty tight), then he began throwing the items into the bed of his truck as fast as he could. My ladyfriend was just shaking her head in disbelief.
Some damage was done to the side of The Beater, mostly scraped paint. This reinforces my resolve to never, EVER take Charlene into a public parking lot. I've seen some stupid GD people in my time, but nothing quite like this.
-JD
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