From another NG (;-p):
One of the scientists who recently left Monsanto (the biotech company famous for "killer seeds" and Genetically Modified (GM) plants producing "broad spectrum pest poisons") could be persuaded to tell about some secret research at Monsanto and the philosophy behind it. Story follows:
In an empire, the only issue is control. Past empires did so by taxes, bread & circuses, inquisition, military occupation but that left a possibility of revolution, as long as people had access to healthy food and clean water. At Monsanto, which BTW is the imperial bio-control center under the disguise of a biotech company, the strategy has been to transfer control from the world's farmers and gardeners to the lineage of pro-profit deciders, presently, King George the decider, PBUH (Profit Be Upon Him).
With the rapid disappearance of naturally fertile food crops, the imperial decider decides who eats, who farts and who fasts. The latest development, cereals, fruits and nuts with Inbuilt-Rodent-Kill (IRKT), had a few inadvertent side-effects. One was, dead rodents could be found in the fields, they were eaten by birds of prey, cats and dogs who subsequently died which worried environmentalists and pet-owners. The solution, a modification so the rodent meat became sweet, just before the rodent died. Result, ants too had great appetite in that meat. We were lucky, the ants didn't die from poisoned rat consumption so nobody noticed what had happened. But then, Murphy struck! Apparently there was IRKT in the pollen left too and the bees were vulnerable to it: their immune system weakened and they got disorientated. In that condition, leaving the hive, they won't return: after dying, ants too eat them rapidly so no trace is left behind.
We had to report regularly to the imperial department of the PPPP (Pro Profit Progress Party) and a week after our report on the disappearing bees, a crate of the best champagne was delivered for the staff and the scientists, with a message from the King (PBUH): "Congratulations comrades, for this great achievement that pleases the King and decider. The new mechanical bees with advanced nanotechnology have left the experimental phase and are ready to replace the now defunct bio-bees. Cheers, to total control!"
The new mechanical pollinators can't be bought, they have to be rented from Monsanto. Default, they are equipped with a 3D camera, a wireless Internet connection, GPS to measure distances, a pollination counter for billing, a sensitive microphone and a miniature syringe with a toxin to neutralize Anti-Patriotic Elements (APEs) when spotted. Future models will use so little energy that they can also fly at night, to assist the PPPP. Even bedroom secrets will be transferred to the imperial data base and checked on reverence to the PPPP and King George the decider (PBUH)!