I don't know what works best to use for lube, but I bet somebody has some ideas! I know you need to go just a little way then back the tap off to break the chip, and about every second turn back it all the way out and clean the tap. Aluminum has a way of grabbing taps and not letting go if you let that chip build up in there!
The drill size - the actual numbered bit size is best, but if you look at the decimal equivalent and go just a hair one way or the other, it will work, too. Numbered bits should also be available individually from an industrial oriented auto parts store (most NAPAs in my area)
I was going to suggest using an upside-down socket extension (1/4" drive) to extend out to the T-handle, but I like that idea of using a 12-point socket that fits the tap - Stutzer, that suggestion is a real winner!