The thing is... I said all cylinders have compression, but I never
> asked my buddy what the compression was. So, today I checked for
> myself, and saw that the cylinders only had 90ish compression, and I'm
> reasonably sure that's the reason the car won't start. The rings and
> valves were all replaced, everything was torqued back to factory specs
> with new gaskets blah blah... any ideas on why the compression is so > low?
Didn't read the old post, but if everything is new and good, then the timing of the valves may not be 'in phase' with the crank. As if the timing chain or belt skipped a tooth or three.