How to change Oil

only i would wait until 7500 miles before changing the oil old john
Hello, I.! You wrote on Sat, 8 Mar 2008 14:41:42 -0800:
IC> 1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles since the
IC> last oil change. IC> 2) Drink a cup of coffee IC> 3) 15 minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly maintained IC> vehicle.
IC> Money spent: IC> Oil Change: $20.00 IC> Coffee: $1.00 IC> Total: $21.00
IC> Oil Change instructions for Men :
IC> 1) Wait until Saturday, drive to auto parts store and buy a case of IC> oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree, write a IC> check for $50.00. IC> 2) Stop and buy a case of beer, write a check for $20, drive home. IC> 3) Open a beer and drink it. IC> 4) Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands. IC> 5) Find jack stands under kid's pedal car. IC> 6) In frustration, open another beer and drink it. IC> 7) Place drain pan under engine. IC> 8) Look for 9/16 box end wrench. IC> 9) Give up and use crescent wrench. IC> 10) Unscrew drain plug. IC> 11) Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil: splash hot oil on you in process. IC> Cuss. IC> 12) Crawl out from under car to wipe hot oil off of face and arms. IC> Throw kitty litter on spilled oil. IC> 13) Have another beer while watching oil drain. IC> 14) Spend 30 minutes looking for oil filter wrench. IC> 15) Give up; crawl under car and hammer a screwdriver through oil IC> filter and twist off IC> 16) Crawl out from under car with dripping oil filter splashing oil IC> everywhere from holes. Cleverly hide old oil filter among trash in IC> trash can to avoid environmental penalties. Drink a beer. IC> 17) Install new oil filter making sure to apply a thin coat of oil to IC> gasket surface. IC> 18) Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine. IC> 19) Remember drain plug from step 11. IC> 20) Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan. IC> 21) Drink beer. IC> 22) Discover that first quart of fresh oil is now on the floor. Throw IC> kitty litter on oil spill. IC> 23) Get drain plug back in with only a minor spill. Drink beer. IC> 24) Crawl under car getting kitty litter into eyes. Wipe eyes with oily IC> rag used to clean drain plug. Slip with stupid crescent wrench IC> tightening drain plug and bang knuckles on frame removing any excess IC> skin between knuckles and frame. IC> 25) Begin cussing fit. IC> 26) Throw stupid crescent wrench. IC> 27) Cuss for additional 5 minutes because wrench hit bowling trophy. IC> 28) Beer. IC> 29) Clean up hands and bandage as required to stop blood flow. IC> 30) Beer. IC> 31) Dump in five fresh quarts of oil. IC> 32) Beer. IC> 33) Lower car from jack stands. IC> 34) Move car back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil spilled IC> during any missed steps. IC> 35) Beer. IC> 36) Test drive car. IC> 37) Get pulled over: arrested for driving under the influence. IC> 38) Car gets impounded. IC> 39) Call loving wife, make bail. IC> 40) 12 hours later, get car from impound yard.
IC> Money spent: IC> Parts: $50.00 IC> DUI: $2500.00 IC> Impound fee: $75.00 IC> Bail: $1500.00 IC> Beer: $20.00 IC> Total: $4,145.00 IC> But you know the job was done right!
With best regards, E-mail:
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