Well today as I turned right ( West ) off my block onto Main St, I swing
out all the way over to the left lane. I'm behind some company Astro
Van. In the middle lane is a green Explorer 2 door all smashed to hell.
Two young'uns inside.
The rear bumper is folded down to the point it actually facing up &
down. The quarter panels are buckled and the LF front fender is smashed
in along the top edge of the fender, not the side.
When we catch the next light 4 blocks from my street the Explorer
decides to drive along side me. His front tire is even with my front
door. The driver & passenger are laughing their asses off for some
The Astro is rolling about 10 over the limit, so me being behind doing
40 is fine with me. I'd like to move over but can't.
The Explorer has me boxed in.
For the next mile the Explorer hangs along side me constantly tapping
his gas pedal, you can hear the engine rev & drop, rev & drop.
At the light by the Chevy dealer the Explorer drops behind me, moves
into the left turn lane which has the red arrow at this point, as I go
through the center of the intersection the Explorer revs it up and
swings out of the left turn lane and gets behind me, cuts back to the
middle lane and then zooms up even with my front door again.
2 miles down, I'm still boxed in, more laughing is heard coming from the
At the 3 mile light the Explorer drops behind me because the middle lane
has a back up at the light. We clear the intersection and a spot opens
up as we pass by Red Lobster, the Ford whips in steps on the gas and
roars up along side me but won't pass. Nobody is in front of him for
over a block.
Unfortunately, I can't make any quick maneuvers due to the problems my
car was experiencing today. The Astro and I are still cruising at 40 and
amazingly in the 3 + miles I've driven since leaving my house there was
not one left turner in front of us.
Passing by the mall at the 4 mile light the Astro picks up speed
somewhat so I kick it up. The Explorer cranks it up and comes within a
foot of the car in front of it. They are still laughing for some reason
Howard Stern is off the air here, so it can't be him making them laugh.
Now the driver is looking down out of his window into my car, He's
chattering about something. I had the windows on the passenger side
closed at the time.
At the 5 mile light by the Buick dealer the Explorer made his first
mistake. He got over in the right lane to pass a slower car. He's now
stuck in the right lane which becomes an Exit only lane for Northbound
At the last minute he cuts back over into the middle lane. At this point
the Main Street is now two lanes going west. The Explorer is about two
cars behind me.
He then makes his second mistake, he gets behind me. There is another
Exit coming up on the right for Southbound IL 43 that I want to take.
The Astro & I are still in the left lane doing 50, the exit ramp quickly
approaching. The Astro passes a slower moving car on our right, as I
pass it I slip in ahead of it.
Meanwhile cars are coming down the enter ramp trying to merge onto the
street I'm trying to get off of. We meld into one straight lines of
cars, some move to the left I move to the right, ready to take the
upward sweeping full circle entrance ramp.
A quick look in the mirror I spy the Explorer still behind the Astro.
Suddenly, A horn is blown ! Then all of a sudden when you think its
next to impossible the Explorer cuts across three lanes of traffic at
the last minute and comes flying up behind me almost to the bumper as I
just start to hit the on ramp.
Looking in the rearview mirror these strokes are still laughing. But the
laughter is about to end ! For I will have the last laugh.
Driving a front wheel drive car I can take this ramp at 50 + mph. I give
it the gas and hoped the car could take it, And take it, it did ! A rear
wheel drive SUV has to slow way down.
Tires squealing, Explorer starts dropping farther & farther back, as my
car ascends the sweep of the circle shaped ramp I give it more gas. I
hold it steady around 51 mph gripping the steering wheel like Speed
Racer did when he went up against Duggery.
When you get to the top and straighten out there is about a 2 1/2
block straight run till you have to move over.
As I'm coming out into the straightaway I cranked it up to 70 mph, The
limit is 40 and I'm hoping the Police are somewheres else. Plenty of
room to move to the left. I pass by a Silverado & a semi. Looking in the
mirror the Explorer isn't even at the top of the exit ramp.
I'm hoping I make the green light at 99th, which I did. I move over in
front of yet another semi and slip in behind a tanker truck. I want to
turn right at 101st St.
Looking in the driverside mirror I can't see the Explorer. I miss the
light at 101st, but I end up turning through the hotel driveway, cut
through the parking lot and out the southside driveway onto 101st St.
I was going to the Post Office. The Explorer never had the chance to
even see where I had gone once I got off that exit ramp.
I just can't figure out why they stuck to the side of my car for over 5
miles. There's a good chance I may see this stroke again sometime.
1991 Pontiac Bonneville LE
3800 V6 ( C ), Black/Slate Grey
~~~The Former Fleet ~~~
89 Cavalier Z 24 convertible
78 Holiday 88 coupe
68 LeSabre convertible
73 Impala sedan