How the HELL do you turn off the locking/unlocking function of a Factory Toyota alarm?

Take the battery out of the fob, professor.

duh

Then you have to go to Toyota for a reprogram. No thanks.

Is the fob the kind that's part of the regular key, or a separate thing?

Other than wearing looser pants, what's your suggestion?

I'll say:

That's OK...I'll save the $65 reprogramming fee.

duh.

Part of the key. $65 reprogramming fee. I never did one so I don't know how it's done.

For "only" $65, it can't be too hard. I know the guys that were doing it took all of 5 minutes.

Nonsense. Don't you have a regular key you can use instead of the fob? You don't need the remote.

When you did a google search using the words "reprogram toyota key fob", were any of the 11,100 search results helpful?

Maybe Hach wants to retain the panic button function, in case he runs out of beer.

It doesn't. It explains why he does NOT want to remove the battery.

Jeff, take a deep breath and calm down, OK?

hard plastic and super glue or a key cover...

I was thinking about something like this, but it says it squeezes the keys together.

That's what's causing the problem...

Sorry...

Nah...

This looks like something I want to do all the time...

The first programming option allows you to set the entry unlock to: (A) unlock the driver door with one push, and the remaining doors with a second push OR (B) unlock all of the doors with a single push.

1. Open the driver's door. Remove the key from the ignition switch.
2. (Complete these steps within 40 seconds)
3. Insert the key into and remove it from the ignition switch 2 times. (IN - OUT - IN - OUT)
4. Close, then open the driver's door 2 times. (SHUT - OPEN - SHUT - OPEN)
5. Insert the key into and remove it from the ignition switch 1 time. (IN - OUT)
6. Close, then open the driver's door 2 times. (SHUT - OPEN - SHUT - OPEN)
7. Insert the key into the ignition switch and leave it in.
8. Close the driver's door.
9. Turn the key from LOCK to ON 4 times, ending at LOCK (LOCK - ON - LOCK - ON - LOCK - ON - LOCK - ON - LOCK)
10. Wait for the locks to stop, then remove the key from the ignition switch.
11. On the key fob, press and release both LOCK and UNLOCK buttons at the same time.
12. [For all doors unlock] press and release the UNLOCK button.
13. [For driver door unlock] press and release the LOCK button.
14. Open the driver's door. The programming is complete. If programming did not occur, start over.

Sorry, a poor solution isn't really better than no solution at all after all...

Well, first of all that would be Crown Royal. Beer is just so pedestrian.

Second, the key/fob is part of the security system. There are a limited number of starts once the key with the chip is removed from the car. Removing the battery turns off the security, so I guess I'd have to leave it in the front yard looking pretty and without any security at all...