At a dinner party, one of the guests, an obnoxiously loud young man, tried to make clever remarks about everyone and everything. He was served a piece of meat, he picked it up with his fork, held it up and smirked : "Is this pig?"
Another guest, sitting opposite, asked quietly: "Which end of the fork are you referring to ?"
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And consider the well-known example of Winston Churchill, one of history's most delightful wits. Churchill who loved a good tipple, was at a party and getting a little drunk. A very large and aggresive-looking woman walked up to him, glared and said : "You're drunk!"
Looking calmly at her, he smiled and said: "Madam, I'm drunk and you're ugly. But tomorrow, I'll be sober."
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The ultimate repartee must be that of R.B.Sheridan, the political enemy of William Pitt. Pitt was provoked one day to say to him scornfully: "You will come to your end upon the gallows or of a venereal disease."
"That depends, Mr.Pitt," replied Sheridan," on whether I embrace your principles or your mistress."