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Importance of good tools.

I was driving happily along top down in the afternoon sun today, though at a good clip to be in time to administer my final exam, when my gas went dead. Here is where we goodies owners, who are armed to the teeth with proper tools, show our best side.

I never use a CELL PHONE, of course, but I have one in the trunk for emergencies. A call to the office ensured that the students would get their exam on time. Then peeking at the gas cable with my MINIATURE FLASHLIGHT, it looked to me at first that the bolt that held the gas cable support to the engine block had broken off, but I realized later that the nut had simply disappeared.

Attack the miles of supercharger plumbing with your OVERSIZE SCREWDRIVER. Attempt to fashion a first replacement nut from a SMALL SIZE HOSE CLAMP. Finding that a hose clamp cannot be screwed down to the size of even a M10 nut, use your OVERSIZE BRAIN to discover that a CABLE TIE makes quite a good nut of either standard or metric sizes. Using ADVANCED ANALYTIC TECHNIQUES, establish that where a single tie wrap makes an excellent nut, two are even safer against accidentally dropping off. Restore miles of supercharger plumbing and get the thick cover of oil that the previous supercharger leaked on the area off your hands using the FAST YELLOW WIPES you have in a plastic bag.

Make it to the exam only about half an hour late. After the exam, drive to the local hardware store to get a new nut. Repeat removal of plumbing exercise. Use HOBBY KNIFE and NEEDLE NOSE PLIERS to get out nut made of plastic tie wraps. Tap free the bolt with handle of screwdriver. When it gets stuck at the end going out, use RATCHET with 17MM SOCKET to screw it out. Use bolt to acquire the correct locking nut inside hardware store using SMALL CHANGE. Attempt unsuccessfully to screw bolt back in. Using SUPERIOR INTELLIGENCE, lift up supercharger to get its support hole to align with the bracket hole. Use 17 mm socket and rachet, as well as a 17MM WRENCH to screw the locking nut on the bolt. Struggle for a couple of hours to get the plumbing back on, using SUPERIOR LINGUISTICS to express the effect of modifications of modifications on ease of working on engine. Drive away into where the sunset was a few hours ago.

Leon

Reply to
Leon van Dommelen
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Gas cable?

Ah! Throttle cable.

Now it's clear.

Excellent field repair.

I had a similar sort of situation once, though it wasn't tools I really needed.

Way back when in 1984, I'd moved to Southern California, had been there for a few months when I went out with some co-workers to the Malibu Grand Prix in Northridge, about 25 miles from my apartment in Thousand Oaks. It got late, the place was closing, we all went to leave. For some reason I can't recall today, I delayed leaving long enough that the parking lot was empty. I tried to start my non-Miata (a

1968 Mercury Cougar XR-7) and it wouldn't crank over at all. Hmmm... is my park/neutral safety switch acting up again? So I popped the hood, hopped out and used my BIG SCREWDRIVER to kick the starter solenoid and the motor fired right up, and the car started backing away from me, headed directly for the plate glass windows at the front the establishment.

I'd left it in reverse and didn't notice. I hadn't even been drinking. Oh well, I thought quickly and lunged for the coil wire on the distributor, figured I could pull it off and stop the car. I succeeded, but in doing so had pulled the cap far enough to the side that the rotor hit the cap and broke into several pieces.

It was 1145pm in a place that I had no family and no friends nearby. I didn't even know the area very well. I walked to a PHONE BOOTH and looked for a car parts store open late within walking distance. Duh. Doesn't exist.

So I looked in my trunk, and found a tube of SILICONE ADHESIVE and a BUTANE LIGHTER. It took a couple of hours and a few attempts, but I eventually managed to glue the rotor back together solidly enough to drive home, using the lighter to heat the assembly gently to cure the silicone glue and speed up the curing process.

The next morning, the rotor was so solid I couldn't believe it was being held together by silicone glue that had been baked over a BIC LIGHTER.

Of course, I don't smoke. I just liked playing with lighters.

Dana

Reply to
Dana Myers

I believe Leon has been one-upped.

Reply to
Frank Berger

Perhaps. But I really admire the way both Leon and Dana handicapped themselves for extra challenge: Leon by having a supercharger, and Dana by having a Mercury.

:-)

Reply to
Lanny Chambers

And now, as usual, they have both been upped by Lanny!

Chris

92BB&T
Reply to
Chris D'Agnolo

Yup. One thing never to forget about a Mercury - there's a Ford heart beating inside.

Though I must say, that old 302 ran great, though I broke one C4 tranny and had headaches from then on with the replacement.

Reply to
Dana Myers

Sorry, L.C.; meant to reply to group:

Good stories. Especially like the parts about CABLE TIE and SILICONE ADHESIVE and a BUTANE LIGHTER. Field ingenuity; LOVE it!

Perhaps we could take the OVERSIZE SCREWDRIVER, SMALL SIZE HOSE CLAMP, FAST YELLOW WIPES, HOBBY KNIFE, NEEDLE NOSE PLIERS, SUPERIOR LINGUISTICS and BIC LIGHTER and use them on 'underground', 'me', and '$$Man' and the rest of the spammers who seem to have found their way through the filters of this and every other NG that I read!

Who buys stuff from these reptiles, anyway.

Steve McMahon Green JRSC '00LS

Reply to
McMahon

Leon McGyver ???

The merest trace of a whiff of a hint of such a concept boggles the mind. After all, McGyver was just an amateur. Leon is a bona fide ROCKET SCIENTIST.

Reply to
Lanny Chambers

Don't you mean: "Leon has been successful in provoking an even more interesting story?"

Leon :)

Reply to
Leon van Dommelen

Leon,

I'm sure your students were tickled pink that you made it to classroom in time and that they didn't have to miss a fun filled final exam! I half expect my students to deliberately sabotage my Miata at exam time since they all know it's my car. They've asked me to trade it in on a Ford Focus, insuring they would receive numerous days off throughout the semester! Glad you were able to get back on the road with a little yankee ingenuity and McGyver like spirit.

Tom

92 Red

Le> I was driving happily along top down in the afternoon sun today,

Reply to
Tom Howlin

I thought it was more along the lines of "Leon has been successful in provoking another interesting story". I'm rather impressed by your clever field repair.

Dana

Reply to
Dana Myers

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